Wednesday, March 13, 2013

An Open Letter to the Holy Spirit Regarding Cardinal Dolan, St. Patrick, and All Things Holy and Good

Your Thrice Holiness,

I believe, I adore, I hope, and I love Thee.  

And I have a suggestion for You for the conclave.

I couldn’t help but notice that this is the feast week of the glorious St. Patrick, patron of my ancestral home and spiritual father of the Irish diaspora.  I was thinking, what better way to honor this great lover of Christ—through whose progeny You’ve done so much good work--than if You picked one of his children this time to don the white cassock.  His installation Mass could be this Sunday, St. Patrick’s Day, and, oh, I don’t know, maybe he could even choose Patrick as his papal name (and this has nothing to do with my bets in our diocesan papal pool).

Now, I know a guy.

There’s a cardinal dear to me, having served in my home state of Wisconsin for a while, who I think might be a good choice. 

He’s Irish (American) and therefore both naturally loveable and a gifted communicator.  While in Milwaukee, he dispensed his archdiocese from the requirement of having to abstain from meat on a Friday in Lent in order that they might properly celebrate the glorious saint’s day with corned beef.  Also while he was there I’m sure he must’ve developed a taste for Millers, and how awesome would it be to see our next pope with a High Life in hand during cocktail hour at the Vatican.

And he looks a little bit like this

I will love whomever you pick and promise to write about him and his many wonderful qualities next week.  But in the meantime, I thought I’d make this suggestion in case You were looking for ideas.

With great love and affection,

Meg

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